Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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