And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."