Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(802): View more from Vermont

i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.

(802): View more from Vermont

...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.

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(802): i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager. (802): ...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon. http://tfl.nu/jfhq

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(416): View more from Ontario

No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her

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(416): No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her http://tfl.nu/hm02

Replies (108) Good night (4167) Bad night (1208)
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(847): View more from Illinois

So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be

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(847): So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be http://tfl.nu/8bju

Replies (209) Good night (20159) Bad night (1231)
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(915): View more from Texas

I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic

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(915): I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic http://tfl.nu/4fd0

Replies (35) Good night (3653) Bad night (1689)
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(314): View more from Missouri

So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.

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(314): So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs. http://tfl.nu/hgyg

Replies (14) Good night (5355) Bad night (1243)
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(240): View more from Maryland

oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times

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(240): oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times http://tfl.nu/z2iz

Replies (12) Good night (6613) Bad night (1080)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..

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(973): can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces.. http://tfl.nu/3uan

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(307): View more from Wyoming

I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.

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(307): I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen. http://tfl.nu/qqp8

Replies (8) Good night (3858) Bad night (1616)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine

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(403): You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine http://tfl.nu/d0ou

Replies (23) Good night (3048) Bad night (1516)
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(772): View more from Florida

You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.

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(772): You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list. http://tfl.nu/hcyy

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(912): View more from Georgia

Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say

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(912): Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say http://tfl.nu/bgnm

Replies (2) Good night (1068) Bad night (425)
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(616): View more from Michigan

Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's

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(616): Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's http://tfl.nu/uou0

Replies (12) Good night (982) Bad night (498)
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(419): View more from Ohio

Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.

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(419): Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women. http://tfl.nu/y0qe

Replies (2) Good night (534) Bad night (883)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies

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(413): This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies http://tfl.nu/p3t8

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.

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(412): I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole. http://tfl.nu/a32r

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