You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
