Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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