Just mADE A PArabola og urine
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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