I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
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It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
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There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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