You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
