North Korea, Best Korea!
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
