I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize