she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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