i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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