So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Randomize
