u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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