Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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