oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize