I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
