i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
