watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
