Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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