I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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