whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
