Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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