I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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