is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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