she kept yelling 'call me bella'
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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