I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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