WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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