Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
He passed out mid-signature
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
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