your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
