marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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