We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
ttyl tear gas
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
