we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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