Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
