If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
