This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
