Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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