Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Randomize
