No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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