drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
