there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
