I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
