I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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