you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
