i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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