Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(972): View more from Texas

like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys

(214): View more from Texas

I hope to god you are high

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(708): View more from Illinois

Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.

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(562): View more from California

I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.

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(518): View more from New York

idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(216): View more from Ohio

Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing

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(704): View more from North Carolina

There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.

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(914): View more from New York

Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.

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(+61): View more from Australia

Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose

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(208): View more from Idaho

I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.

(216): View more from Ohio

You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.

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