belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.