i was born a porn star she said
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Randomize
