just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize