we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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