I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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