Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
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