at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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