i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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